This project is based on my personal experience of loss and the search for connections to my own childhood. When I was 9 years old, my mother left for Germany for four years. It was the 1990s in Russia, when many people were leaving for other countries in search of a better life. By the time she returned, I was already a teenager, and those years we spent apart forever changed my childhood memories. What once felt like a safe and complete childhood became a series of fragmented images, which I now view from the distance of adulthood. For this project, I used my own childhood drawings as symbols of unfinished dreams and fantasies. These drawings embody the lost moments and the gap between my younger self and the reality of being separated from my mother for several years. The protagonist in my photographs revisits these memories, trying to reconnect with the days when childhood felt whole and carefree. The project explores the rupture between the past and the present, between what my childhood could have been and what it actually became. Through this work, I aim to evoke emotions and reflections on how early losses can shape our perception of ourselves and the world around us